Make Deeply Considered Choices

To know what you prefer
instead of humbly saying Amen
to what the world tells you you ought to prefer,
is to have kept your soul alive.
- Robert Louis Stevenson

Never allow a person to tell you NO
who doesn't have the power to say YES.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Is freedom anything else than the right
to live as we wish? Nothing else.
- Epictetus

Today's affirmation:
I have no need to conform to the stereotypes others have defined for me.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Each of us has a choice in all matters. There is nothing that any of us ever HAVE to do. Each of us, man or woman, chooses the roles we play, and what we make of our lives at each instant. Expectation and Tradition are burdens we take upon ourselves, or choose to throw off.

Does this mean becoming selfish? Not at all, it means becoming selective. It always means doing what we believe is right, regardless of the expectations of others.

Expectations (Demands) suck the juice out of life. Don't believe that you are bound by the demands of others. You do not have to conform to the stereotypes others have defined for you.

Further reading: Trust Your Own Wisdom

Intention versus Expectation (Demand)

Why I Choose to Believe that Others are Never the Cause of My Unhappiness

Chose Adventure
     

Reject Stereotypes

Is freedom anything else than the right
to live as we wish? Nothing else.
- Epictetus

Never allow a person to tell you NO
who doesn't have the power to say YES.
- Eleanor Roosevelt 

To know what you prefer
instead of humbly saying Amen
to what the world tells you you ought to prefer,
is to have kept your soul alive.
- Robert Louis Stevenson

Today's affirmation:
I have no need to conform to the stereotypes others have defined for me.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Each of us has a choice in all matters. There is nothing that any of us ever HAVE to do. Each of us, man or woman, chooses the roles we play, and what we make of our lives at each instant. Expectation and Tradition are burdens we take upon ourselves, or choose to throw off.

Does this mean becoming selfish? Not at all, it means becoming selective. It always means doing what we believe is right, regardless of the expectations of others.

As an example, imagine that our aging parent needs our help. There are three courses we can steer: #1. Care for them, but grumble and complain about how unfair and burdensome life is, how we are expected to provide assistance, and how unhappy it makes us to care for our mom. #2. Choose to make other arrangements for mom's care. #3. Be of service to mom because we CHOOSE to make a free-will gift of our time, energy and love.

I propose that #2 is preferable to #1. Visualizing myself as an aging parent (which doesn't take a lot of imagining), I wouldn't want an unhappy person around me who thought I was a burden. Naturally, I believe that #3 is the best option. But the way to get to #3 is to understand that #2 is also a choice. Unless we truly believe that #2 is an option, we can't reach #3, and we get stuck with #1, feeling resentful and victimized.

Life isn't fair. We can't choose our circumstances. But we can choose happiness, or not.

Conscious choices are NOT easy. It is much easier to believe that we are tossed about helplessly on the ocean of circumstances.

Expectations (Demands) suck the juice out of life. Don't believe that you are bound by the demands of others. You do not have to conform to the stereotypes others have defined for you.

Further reading: Intention versus Expectation (Demand)

Chose Adventure

Why I Choose to Believe that Others are Never the Cause of My Unhappiness

Trust Your Own Wisdom
     

Conformity

That you may retain your self-respect, it is better
to displease the people by doing what you know is right,
than to temporarily please them by doing what you know is wrong.
- William J. H. Boetcker

The reward for conformity is that everyone likes you but yourself.
- Rita Mae Brown

Conformity is the jailer of freedom and the enemy of growth.
- John F. Kennedy

The opposite of courage in our society
is not cowardice, it is conformity.
- Rollo May

If you stand up and be counted,
from time to time you may get yourself knocked down.
But remember this: A man flattened by an opponent can get up again.
A man flattened by conformity stays down for good.
- Thomas J. Watson

Today's affirmation:
I have no need to conform to the stereotypes
others have defined for me.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Further reading: A Foolish Consistency

My Own Person

How to Deal with Rejection

The Choice to be Free

Be Yourself

Values

Responsibility